What Could've Been....

 "So, have you graduated yet?"

 I've been asked the question a couple times, seeing that the high school I was originally going to graduate from is having it's '09 graduation within 24 hours. As it got closer, the more people I talked to asked that question. But my answer every time was "No". That's all I'd say. Maybe a "nope" or something like that, but never a full detailed description of what was going on.

 I see the '09 graduation stuff all over myspace, facebook, that stuff. Signs in front of houses showing parents are happy of their kid. I've heard the cheesy quotes for upcoming graduations. And the strangest feeling is, I could've/should've/would've been a part of all of that.

 I've lied to people over the past 2 years saying I was in a good position to come back to the school to graduate with them. I got people's hopes up, only to let them down when I'd fail to even pass an online school. School just has never been my thing, and I believe I might never get a handle on it.

 I believe I'm a smart guy, I believe I am smarter that most of the kids graduating later today. But when it came to school, I disappeared. Dumb decisions and mistakes brought my downfall, and there was only myself to blame. 

 I can't make excuses when it comes to school, I just know that it's always kicked my ass. My dad, in his own quotes said something along the lines of "I remember you going into Kindergarten and getting good grades up until 3rd grade. Then everything kind of went downhill and it was the same C's and D's every year."

 I managed to pass every grade barely up until my Sophomore year in high school, where it just finally caught up to me. I was given a choice to stay or go to another school, and I look at that day as a reason I am here today. Who knows what would happen if I had stayed and had to work my ass off to stay another year. Who knows what would happen if I went to the school that I was recommended to go, where I heard that my friend graduated from 3 weeks ago? I chose the school my mom felt was "right" for me, and well, I failed. 

 But with all that free time on my hands, I realized my love for writing, my love for basketball, my love for my family, my love for many things, things I didn't love before. And I'm happy, which many people aren't nowadays. 

 Will I go anywhere in life sitting at my mom's house, on the computer all day? Probably not, but I'm happy in this life. I have an amazing friend in Alysa, who supports me all the way, in whatever I do, I guess. She's really the key to my life being the best it can be. Without her, I'm...lifeless probably. 

 But, the point is, I'm not graduating today. If I chose to stay at the school, I doubt I'd still be able to graduate, knowing I was in a position where it was tough to escape. It would have been interesting to have gone to the school though with Sasha playing the way he was last year, with the long hair, knowing I'd get the same compliments I get today. Haha.

 Honestly, I am happy for everyone who is graduating and I hope they are able to make a positive impact on this world. I'm with them all the way, and I want them to know I am there for them if for some reason things get crazy, no matter how well I know them.

Biggest Game Of The Season

With the biggest game of the season being this Sunday, when the Lakers play the Rockets in Game 7, it should be no surprise when you hear that fans are scared or nervous. As it gets closer, and the fans give their comments, fans feel less nervous and more pumped for the game.

For me, I am not worried about the game. I'm more worried about not being able to wake up in time, as it is an early game, which either gives you a whole day to celebrate the win or a whole day to come up with as many ideas as possible on how to deal with one of the worst losses in franchise history.

It isn't that I'm being over-dramatic and saying it's the biggest loss in history because I feel like it. This would truly be one of the biggest Laker losses ever. 

Going into this year, we were expected, from ESPN to the actual Lakers fans, to win it all. You heard it all the time, 'win or bust for the Lakers'. I guaranteed the Lakers would win the Finals a day after we lost to the Celtics last year. I've stuck by that all year and don't plan on giving that up.

Some Lakers fans have already said they have given up on the year, which is expected because a lot of people are overly negative and want to be perfect, want every game to be 100-0, free tacos for everyone, everyday. 

As someone who only cares about winning, whether it's been 115-76 or 115-114, I have treated every win as what it is, a win. The idea of every game is to win, and the Lakers have done that.

As a huge Jake Plummer fan, I grew to love winning games no matter what the score was. He went 40-18 with the Broncos, leading them to 3 straight playoff appearances. But because those wins weren't "flashy" enough for Mike Shanahan, he was replaced by Jay Cutler because Mike believed he was more "flashy" than Jake and would win games "flashier" than Jake would. Jay Cutler's record with Denver was 17-20.

So when it comes to the Lakers and how they're fans want a 50 point win every game, I kind of ignore that stuff. Yeah, I'll be honest, it would be cool to win by 50 every game, but, in the end, there's no difference between a win by 40 and a win by 13, because, as you can see from this series alone, we lost after we won 108-94 and we lost after we won 118-78. 

The Rockets have given us problems and have scared most fans out of their "fandom", but when we win this Sunday, and face the Nuggets in the next round, we'll be ready. 

My Thoughts On the Manny Ramirez News...

It was 8:52 AM, when I heard the news. I was refreshing twitter while playing NBA 2K9. I came across a post from mrquisp that said "manny is suspended." 

Not really knowing which 'Manny' it was(Pacquiao, Ramirez...), I went with Ramirez and put in "manny ramirez suspended" on google, went to news and it was the first link, Los Angeles Times. I didn't see the news on any other link, just that one. I was kind of laughing at the time because it seemed unreal.

The headline I saw was "Manny will be suspended 50 games for positive drug test." After seeing it online, I changed the channel to ESPN and sure enough, they were in the middle of talking about it. At that point, after seeing it on ESPN, it hit me. I wanted to cry, because I was so shocked.

As more and more found out about the news and more info was being said, I was posting it all over twitter, myspace, facebook, basically saying "I'm shocked.", "I'm gonna throw up.", all of that.

Then we found out the info of it being a female fertility pill. At that point, I didn't feel bad. Ya, he's suspended 50 games, and it's used as a post-steroid 'chaser', but if he passed all those drug tests before, he's clean to me. Why not? 

All signs point to him just making a mistake and getting unlucky. It was a personal thing and he was just unlucky that it happened to be on the list. 

I don't believe it'll affect him long term and I know many Dodger fans will be behind him, as we are all loyal to our players, maybe not Brett Tomko, but that's it. Haha.

I also believe it won't affect the Dodgers long-term either. Sure, they've lost the first 2 games at this point, but if they can win even 50% of the games that Manny is gone, I am fine, because I know, when Manny comes back, we'll be back to playing at a high level again. 

So, while all I read about Manny is negative, I believe they have to look at what he took, the passed drug tests of the past, his response, the doctor's mistake, the Dodger organization's response and Manny's past to make a real, thought out opinion, because all I see is the same answers. Everyone assumes it's steroids, yet they haven't even looked at the info.

So, until July 3rd, I'm pleading "Free Manny". 

Fast Start For The Dodgers

The 2009 season for the Dodgers has started off hot, with an explosive offense led by Manny Ramirez and a youthful pitching staff led by Chad Billingsley. After one month, the Dodgers are leading the NL West division by 3.5 games and they're only 1 game back of the Cardinals for the best record.

The MVP for the Dodgers, in my opinion, isn't Manny Ramirez. It would have to be Andre Ethier. With a .306 batting average and a team-high 22 RBI, which is also tied for 4th in the entire league. Ethier is my favorite player, so it's exciting to see him playing well.

The 'stinkiest' player for the Dodgers would have to be Russell Martin, who is batting .205, lowest batting average of any starter on the team. However, without Martin, we are not the same team and his presence is felt whether he's going 4-4 or 0-4, but he's been struggling all season. Many will say it's because he is tired from playing at a high level for Canada in the World Baseball Classic, which I believe is probably it. I'm sure he'll be fine as the season goes on.

Most surprising player...Orlando Hudson, definitely. I remember when he was playing for the Diamondbacks and he always used to give us problems but noticed he was never anything special outside of that. With a .337 batting average, 2nd highest on the team for everyday starters, 32 hits(highest on the team), and 19 runs(tied for 1st on the team with Manny), he has definitely been a key player for us.

Player to watch this month: Jeff Weaver. He was called up before the Padres game and did a pretty good job. I think, especially with how inconsistent our bullpen has been, he could be key for us. 

Games to look forward to: May 12-14 at Philadelphia. NL championship rematch. May 22-24 vs. Angels. Always a fun matchup.